Trust me, you can do so much better than this with enough time, effort and practice.
As soon as I heard the first sound, I knew this was going to be bad.
You know what, I change my mind. I knew it as soon as I saw that you used a demon picture to get plays.
This is unbelievably amateurish. I am aware you use LMMS, but that really doesn't cut it for an excuse for the track's low quality. LMMS has a solid mixer and you can use external VSTs and samples in it as well. A friend of mine made something in LMMS once or twice and it wasn't this bad. Just practice and make more projects. Experiment with melodies and genres.
I am actually quite impressed with LMMS' capabilities, considering that it is free. I think you could even do automations.
The sound design is terrible in this track. Dubstep isn't just sounds. Remember that the objective is to create basses. So whenever you can, try to get some respectable synths (whichever you feel would be best for you; I prefer Serum because it is easy to figure out with enough time). You might as well try to buy a standard DAW. The DAW you should use really depends on your workflow. I would just buy one that interests you and see how it goes. Paid DAWs are usually easier to use than free ones. I am sure free DAWs could achieve something of similar quality to standard DAWs, but I think it would take a lot more effort to learn using them.
The mix is pretty bad too, but mixing takes time to learn and understand. Practice.
The melodies (if you can call them that) are just non-existent. I would gladly give this a couple extra stars if there were any enjoyable melodies or instruments.
You probably don't have any dubstep sample packs, but I suggest you look into those. Because this percussion is just terrible for what you are trying to achieve here. The remix you linked to had a pretty nice kick and snare.
ELEPS44's remix is slightly better than this, mainly because it has better structure and samples. Like the original, it needs a lot of work as well in terms of mixing and sound design.
I think my favourite thing about this project is the picture. The text is almost illegible, but I think you have the names of the authors of the track and the song name on it. That art could have been so much better, but it was kind of funny to see. Just try to use a more legible font next time (and don't use a demon picture lol).
Good luck with your next projects. Just try to make a track without using clickbait like this. It is just uncalled for. I think you would get much more helpful feedback without it. Getting feedback like "awesome" or "not bad" doesn't really tell you much. I hope some of what I said helps a little.
By the way, I am reading over some tips in these reviews such as "use effects"; That is true, definitely use effects; however, make sure you learn why you are using effects. Don't just blindly use them. For example, reverb is sort of like an echo. It is something that you don't want to use too much of. Too much reverb can make your track messy, but when used right, it can be a nice effect. Just practice with it and don't abuse it.